“It’s a nice day out today, I think I might open up the windows.”
“I feel like being healthy today, I think I’ll grab an apple!”
” i’m feeling a bit hungry, I might go for a big mac”
i swear to god
“I think I’ll go to the gateway today.”
I need to take a shit
via laugh-addict
August 2012
65 posts
10-year-old girls crying because they broke up with their boyfriends. When I was 10 I cried when I missed the morning cartoons.
That awkward moment when you're singing your song and you think that your voice is amazing... →
goo.gl
Then you try to record your voice and it turned out you sound like a dying duck, quack quack quack. -,-
Follow this blog, it’ll make your dash light up with unicorns and freakin’ magic
Yes. :(
“Putting your trust in Allah brings about peace of mind. Knowing Allah will only burden you with what you can handle, gives you strength and motivation.”
—(via abdulbary)
if youre ever feeling down just remember that theres a coca cola machine in singapore that gives you free cans of coke when you hug it
how the hell is that supposed to cheer me up? do you think im going to fly all the way to fucking singapore for a coke. like how is someone else’s gain supposed to brighten my mood?
i think u need a hug
If you don't intend to marry her, keep your hands off another man's future wife.
it’s kind of ridiculous that we have to work our asses off for 13 years in school just to work our asses off for another 2-8+ years in college just to work our asses off in a job that we probably don’t even like, when we were born on this earth without a choice and i for one certainly didn’t sign up for that
this is seriously all i fucking think about
Lol…life…
lobsters would be proud of themselves if they knew how expensive they were
danceswithfaeriesunderthemooon:
If I want to wear make-up…it’s because I want to feel pretty.
For who? (You might want to sit down for this)
for myself.
my love life will never be satisfactory until someone runs through an airport to stop me from getting on a flight
“O son of Adam, how is your heart ever going to be softened by recitation of the Qur’an when all you read for is to reach the end of the Surah.”
—Al Hasan al Basri (rahimahullah)
I wish I could just negotiate with the spiders in my bathroom
- Me: Okay well I really hate killing you guys and I know that without you the world would be overrun with insects, so I love you and all, but I kind of really need to take a shower and I don't wanna drown you or have you panic and bite me.
- Spider: No probs bro I'll just go hang around in that corner until you're done. By the way, your fan is getting really dirty, my cousin's been living in there and he's not so happy with the conditions.
- Me: Oh that's okay I'll have it cleaned and just you can just tell him to move out until it's done.
- Spider: Sure thing, man, I'll be over here until your shower's over.
